What to watch this week: New Movies Spring 2024
Monkey Man
Dev Patel's Gritty Ode to Revenge and Redemption
In a world teeming with superhero flicks and retold fairy tales, Dev Patel’s directorial debut, "Monkey Man," bursts onto the scene like a much-needed shot of adrenaline for action enthusiasts. If you've been scrolling endlessly, wondering "what to watch this week," your search might very well end here.
From the get-go, "Monkey Man" grips you with its raw portrayal of an underdog’s quest for vengeance against the dark underbelly of modern-day India. Patel, pulling double duty as both director and lead, crafts a narrative as punchy as the action sequences themselves. Known for his nuanced performances, Patel surprises with a film that’s as stylish as it is substantive, blending the best of Bollywood flair with bone-crunching, John Wick-esque fight choreography.
The film kicks off with an intensity that sets the stage for a gritty, in-your-face cinematic experience that is both visceral and visually arresting. The action is relentless, with every punch and kick felt in the depths of your couch—though, as the movie's path from Netflix to big screen distribution by Jordan Peele suggests, it's truly meant to be savored in theaters.
Beyond the physical, "Monkey Man" delves into themes of systemic corruption and personal trauma, making its protagonist, nicknamed "Bobby," not just a physical but also an emotional warrior battling against insurmountable odds. His journey from the fighting rings to the heart of criminal empires offers a compelling mix of personal stakes and explosive action that's sure to keep you glued to your seat.
What sets "Monkey Man" apart is not just its action, but its heart. The film provides layers of cultural texture and social commentary, all while showcasing a cast that includes proper representation and characters that resonate with real-world issues. With its stunning cinematography and Patel’s magnetic presence both in front and behind the camera, "Monkey Man" makes a compelling case for being the top pick of "what to watch this week."
So, if you're craving a cinematic experience that combines the thrill of high-octane action with the depth of heartfelt storytelling, "Monkey Man" is a must-watch. It’s a testament to what can be achieved with passion and perseverance, and it solidifies Dev Patel’s place not only as a capable actor but as a visionary filmmaker ready to challenge and change the cinematic landscape.
Might this be what to watch this week?
"Monkey Man" promises to be a thrilling ride and an emotional journey, perfect for those who love their action with a side of substance. Check it out in theaters for the full, bone-mashing, pulpy experience—it's a visual and visceral feast not to be confined to the small screen!
Dune
Part Two
Ah, "Dune: Part Two," where do we even start? If you're combing through the interwebs wondering "what to watch this week," let me park your rover right here. Directed by the ever-versatile Denis Villeneuve, this sequel not only meets but rockets past the high bar set by its predecessor. This is the kind of film that turns your popcorn into a mere afterthought.
Now, for those who feared that Frank Herbert's complex world might crumble under the weight of cinematic adaptation—fear not. Villeneuve crafts a universe so vivid, so meticulously detailed, it's as if the sands of Arrakis are sifting through your fingers. The cultural depth here is not just for show; it’s woven seamlessly into every subplot, every whispered prophecy. You might find yourself thirsting for a deeper understanding of Dune’s desert ethics, where even a single tear is treasured.
What's a space saga without a heart? Enter Timothée Chalamet and Zendaya, whose on-screen romance is as intoxicating as the spice itself—utterly believable, devoid of that saccharine aftertaste that often plagues blockbuster pairings. Their chemistry is a visual sonnet, underscored by Hans Zimmer's score, which might just compel you to storm the soundtrack release gates.
The visuals? Stunning. Every frame a painting, every wide shot a reason to believe in the magic of movies again. And if you're one to appreciate the villains, Austin Butler delivers a performance chilling enough to freeze the suns of Arrakis. His portrayal, a delightful dance of malevolence, ensures that the narrative's tension is as taut as a drumskin.
Why is "Dune: Part Two" worth your time? This film isn’t just seen; it’s felt. From its thoughtful world-building to its pulse-quickening action sequences, it’s a reminder of why we go to the movies—to be swept away, to escape, to feel the impossible within our grasp. If you're searching for "what to watch this week," look no further. "Dune: Part Two" isn’t just a movie; it's an experience.
So, grab your tickets, folks. Movies are back, and "Dune: Part Two" is a clarion call to all who love cinema. It’s time to return to the theater, where the true scope of Villeneuve’s vision can envelop you completely. Don’t miss it—this is epic filmmaking that will be talked about for years to come.
Civil War
A Gritty Odyssey Through A Dystopian America
Directed by Alex Garland, a man not unfamiliar with crafting cerebral science fiction with "Ex Machina" and "Annihilation," "Civil War" emerges as his latest foray into the dystopian—a genre where he continues to excel. The movie offers a gripping road trip across a future America teetering on the brink, punctuated by intense journalistic integrity and the constant thrum of impending chaos. It’s one to watch this week if you're hunting for cinema that goes beyond mere spectacle to poke at the cerebral cortex.
"Civil War" is not your run-of-the-mill blockbuster cluttered with over-the-top CGI and flimsy plotlines; it's a thought-provoking journey embedded with military journalists, racing against time to document the crescendo of a rebellion as it barrels towards the White House. The focus on photojournalists, portrayed with gripping authenticity by Kirsten Dunst and Kaylee Spain, provides a refreshing narrative perspective. Their mission? To capture truth amid turmoil, making Garland's film a mosaic of human experiences rather than a one-dimensional war story.
The film unspools like the most harrowing road trip ever conceived, with each stop uncovering another layer of America’s fragmented psyche. One of the most chilling encounters involves Jesse Plemons in a brief but unforgettable role that nearly steers the film into horror territory. It's a scene that might just be the darkest revelation of what could happen when societal threads unravel.
Garland’s choice to frame the narrative through the lenses of his protagonists ensures "Civil War" steers clear of overt political preachiness. Instead, it invites the audience to observe, interpret, and digest the unfolding drama as if through the viewfinders of their cameras—making it a perfect pick for those tired of straightforward, tell-you-what-to-think narratives.
As A24's ambitious step into larger-budget productions, "Civil War" balances art-house sensibilities with blockbuster demands, creating a visual feast that’s both intellectually stimulating and visually riveting. Seen in IMAX, the film’s scale is genuinely immersive, offering a visceral experience that smaller screens could hardly do justice.
Might this be what to watch this week?
Why should "Civil War" be what to watch this week? Because it’s a film that challenges as much as it entertains, set against a backdrop that’s both timely and timeless. If you crave a cinematic experience that’s as thought-provoking as it is thrilling, Alex Garland’s "Civil War" should be at the top of your list. This is more than just a movie; it’s a poignant exploration of the human condition amidst chaos—perfect for those who like their action with a side of introspection.
So, ready your popcorn and prepare for a ride that's sure to leave you with more questions than answers—a true hallmark of Garland's storytelling prowess. "Civil War" isn’t just another dystopian drama; it’s a masterclass in how to weave human stories through the tapestry of larger-than-life events. Don’t miss it if you’re looking for something profoundly impactful in your cinematic diet this week.
The First
Omen
A Divine Surprise in the Horror Pantheon
Roll the unholy water and cue the creepy choir because "The First Omen," directed by the fresh-out-of-the-TV-box Arasha Stevenson, just may be the dark horse that gallops unexpectedly into your must-watch list this week. Yes, it’s a prequel—a word often synonymous with cinematic despair and disillusionment—yet here we stand, pleasantly shell-shocked.
Set against the eerie backdrop of 1970s Rome, "The First Omen" does what few prequels dream of: it not only matches the eerie allure of its infamous predecessor but in some devilish twists, might even surpass it. A young American woman, poised to pledge her life to the church, finds herself wrestling with more than just her faith as she uncovers a conspiracy dripping with malevolence, enough to make even the most devoted choirboy question his hymn sheet.
Stevenson, taking a stab at her feature debut, orchestrates a symphony of scares that respects its roots yet carves out its own niche in the horror genre. The movie begins with familiar tropes—a devout young woman, secretive clergy, whispers in dark corners—but quickly escalates into a crescendo of genuine terror that makes "The First Omen" a contender for what to watch this week.
Forget the uninspired cash grabs that haunt the prequel landscape. Stevenson's film is a beast of a different breed. Supported by a haunting score that weaves new themes with iconic cues from Jerry Goldsmith’s original, the auditory experience alone is worth the price of admission. Coupled with Nell Tiger Free’s jaw-dropping performance—oscillating from innocence to investigative fervor—this film not only captivates but reinvigorates the classic franchise.
And let’s talk about the practical effects—grotesquely gory and gloriously executed, they anchor the film's authenticity in an era overrun by CGI specters. The ambiance of 1971 is meticulously crafted, from the vintage veneer of Rome to the visceral visuals that leap off the screen, reportedly achieved on a modest budget that belies the film’s visual opulence.
For those with a penchant for dread that lingers and terror that teases the thresholds of the dark, "The First Omen" is what to watch this week. It’s a rare gem that not only meets the chilling legacy of its namesake but occasionally, in the dim glow of a flickering candle, dares to eclipse it.
So, as the shadows lengthen and the faint chorus of foreboding whispers fill the air, make your way to the cinema. "The First Omen" isn’t just a trip down memory lane with a demonic twist—it’s a whole new nightmare that promises to haunt long after the credits roll. Consider this your divine intervention: miss it at your peril.
Road
House
A Reboot with a Roundhouse Kick
Jake Gyllenhaal has dusted off Patrick Swayze’s mullet and tight jeans to step into the iconic role of Dalton in Doug Liman's reimagining of "Road House," a film that does for roundhouse kicks what apple pie does for America. Streaming now on Amazon Prime, this remake of the 1980s cult classic transports us to the sultry climes of the Florida Keys, where an ex-UFC fighter takes up bouncing duties only to find himself tangled in local troubles that demand more than just a good left hook.
Here’s the kicker—literally and metaphorically—Liman’s "Road House" tries to resurrect the earnest absurdity of its predecessor, and boy, does it throw punches in its attempt. This isn't just a film; it's a nostalgia-soaked voyage into a genre that revels in its own ridiculousness. Remember the days when plot armor was as thick as the biceps it protected? "Road House" (2024) drags them back, kicking and screaming, into the spotlight.
For what to watch this week, Gyllenhaal’s chiseled jaw isn’t the only thing that's hard-hitting. His dedication to the role is palpable, sculpting Dalton into a hero who is part philosopher, part fighter, a man who thinks with his fists but speaks from his heart. As he navigates the murky moral waters of a town bubbling with corruption, the film serves up a cocktail of brawls that are as much a visual spectacle as they are a testament to Gyllenhaal's commitment to the physical role.
But let’s not skirt around the punching bag here; the film's dedication to maintaining the original’s campy legacy is its blessing and its curse. The action sequences, laden with CGI, zip and zoom with all the frenzy of a caffeinated cameraman at a boxing match. It's an aesthetic that will either pull you into its whirlwind or leave you dizzy at its periphery. And Conor McGregor’s mid-movie villainy introduction? A bare-knuckle narrative twist that might have been more gripping in a quieter film, yet here, it risks being lost in the melee.
This movie, likely a contender for "what to watch this week," juggles nostalgia and novelty with the shaky hands of a first-time bartender. It serves up a shot of the old with a punch of the new. Liman’s "Road House" knows its audience—or thinks it does. It’s an unabashed, unapologetic foray into a genre that thrives on excess. Whether it’s the crunch of breaking bones or the slick sheen of sweat on muscle, the film delivers an aesthetic that’s all about feeling something, anything, in an era of cinematic sensory overload.
Might this be what to watch this week?
In short, "Road House" (2024) is exactly what it set out to be: a revival of a type of movie that doesn’t really get made anymore, for better or worse. It’s a rollicking, raucous ride through tropes that feel as worn as the leather on Dalton’s boots, yet somehow, still manage to kick up enough dust to be entertaining. So, if you’re in the mood for a film that punches first and asks questions later, make "Road House" what to watch this week. Just remember, like its 1980s ancestor, it’s best enjoyed with a generous suspension of disbelief and perhaps, a side of Factor’s chef-crafted meals.
Love
Lies
Bleeding
A Riveting Blend of Muscle and Melodrama
If you're scouring the entertainment landscape wondering what to watch this week, plant yourself firmly in the world of "Love Lies Bleeding," a cinematic concoction that blends the sweat of a gritty 80s gym with the allure of a forbidden romance. Directed by the visionary Rose Glass, who previously captivated us with "Saint Maud," this film marks another audacious entry into her repertoire, proving that her sophomore effort is anything but a slump.
"Love Lies Bleeding" thrusts us into the tumultuous romance between Lou, played by the ever-transformative Kristen Stewart, and Jackie, a formidable bodybuilder portrayed by Katie O'Brien. Set against the backdrop of a neon-lit 1989, this film isn't just a throwback—it's a throwdown, capturing the essence of an era where every day was a battle against conformity.
The plot dives into the murky waters of familial secrets and the dark underbelly of bodybuilding, where the quest for physical perfection meets the harsh realities of personal demons. Stewart delivers a performance that is as raw as it is riveting, complementing O'Brien's portrayal, which effortlessly marries physical intensity with vulnerable humanity.
What to watch this week? "Love Lies Bleeding" is not just a suggestion—it's a must. This film offers more than just visual nostalgia; it's a masterclass in mood, a blend of shadow and substance that grips you from the first frame and refuses to let go. The cinematography is a love letter to the late 80s, complete with a soundtrack that’s as pulse-pounding as the plot.
Might this be what to watch this week?
For those weary of the same old sequels and reboots dominating theaters, Rose Glass’s latest offers a refreshing jolt of originality. It’s a film that dares to dream big and dirty, wrapping its muscular arms around you and plunging you into a world where love is the ultimate workout.
So, if you're looking for what to watch this week, make it "Love Lies Bleeding." It’s not just a film; it’s an experience—a sweaty, heart-pounding journey back in time that proves sometimes the most beautiful stories are the ones that aren’t afraid to get a little dirty.
I.S.S.
Does This Space Thriller Escape Earth's Gravity?
If you're looking for what to watch this week and are floating aimlessly through a sea of cinematic choices, let me orbit your attention towards "I.S.S.," a space thriller that promises more than just astronomical anomalies. Directed with an ambitious, albeit wobbly hand, the film locks its coordinates on a conflict aboard the International Space Station amid terrestrial turmoils.
"I.S.S." launches with a premise ripe for high-tension drama—astronauts from rival nations must grapple with Earth-bound orders that test their loyalties and sanity. It's a claustrophobic paranoia fest that’s as tight as the compartments of the ISS itself. However, despite the lofty aspirations, the film occasionally feels as if it's lost in its own space, with a narrative that floats a bit too freely among clichés that even gravity can't ground.
The film sets up a January launchpad—a month famously littered with cinematic misfires and surprises. And while "I.S.S." doesn’t plummet into the abyss of the former, it doesn’t quite rocket to the heights of must-see either. It orbits around the 'decently watchable' category, much like last year's "Plain" with Gerard Butler, providing a totally acceptable gravity escape but unlikely to be a giant leap in your cinematic journey.
Ariana DeBose, as the lead, maneuvers through her zero-g environment with a performance that’s solid if not entirely magnetic. Her character is sketchily drawn—intentionally isolated, emotionally and narratively, which might leave viewers floating adrift rather than tightly tethered to her story. John Gallagher Jr. offers a clean-shaven surprise, but again, the depth is as thin as the station's hull.
Technically, "I.S.S." is a mixed bag of nuts and bolts. The weightless choreography is commendable—actors glide and pivot with a balletic grace that’s visually absorbing. Yet, the camera work, aiming to mimic the disorienting nature of zero gravity, sometimes spirals into a dizzying array that might have you reaching for the space-sickness bag rather than the popcorn.
In a cinematic universe where space flicks like "Gravity" and "Interstellar" have set the bar sky-high, "I.S.S." feels like a small step rather than a giant leap. However, if what to watch this week includes a craving for a space-set thriller that offers a few thrills and a new view on global conflicts from an orbital perspective, then "I.S.S." might just be enough to satisfy a more terrestrial set of expectations.
Might this be what to watch this week?
So, should you strap in and launch into viewing "I.S.S."? If you're a fan of space dramas and January thrillers, this might orbit your cinematic sweet spot. Otherwise, you might find it just a bit too floaty, where the ambition of its reach slightly exceeds its gravitational grasp.
Sting
When Campy Creature Features Crawl Back for More
For those scouting out what to watch this week, let "Sting" creep onto your radar—a cheeky throwback to the monster movies of yore, brought to life with a dash of modern mischief and mayhem. If you're prepared for a film that dances wildly—and wickedly—on the line between terror and titters, then this is the web you want to get caught in.
Directed by the mind behind the "Wormwood" series, "Sting" doesn’t just flirt with camp; it marries it. In this feature, a young girl named Charlotte raises what starts as a tiny spider into an enormous, flesh-hungry beast within the cramped confines of an apartment building. What follows is a wildly entertaining fusion of family drama and creature-feature horror that manages to be both ludicrous and endearing at the same time.
The cinematic spider at the center of "Sting" is as much a creature of CGI as it is of character. From its first moments on screen, scampering ominously from a crashed asteroid, the film sets its tone: this is going to be fun, frantic, and a little bit freaky. Think "Eight-Legged Freaks" meets "The Blob," but with a dash of "Arachnophobia" for those craving some legitimate spine-tingles along with their laughs.
Where "Sting" spins a more intricate web is in its unexpected plunge into the dynamics of a blended family grappling with change. Charlotte’s relationship with her stepfather provides a backdrop of tender human drama that juxtaposes sharply with the over-the-top spider scares. It’s a balancing act that wobbles at times—perhaps a struggle to maintain its footing amidst the absurdity of its arachnid antagonist.
But oh, the camp! "Sting" delights in its genre. It’s a film that knows its audience and one that knows itself even better. From a sarcastic exterminator to a know-it-all tenant, the characters are caricatures, yet they’re played with such gusto that you can’t help but be charmed. And for those with a penchant for the gory, "Sting" doesn’t skimp on the R-rated thrills—this is a creature feature that isn’t afraid to spill some blood.
Might this be what to watch this week?
So, what to watch this week? If you're in the mood for a movie that combines humor, horror, and a bit of heartfelt drama, then let "Sting" be your choice. It’s the kind of film that invites you to laugh at its ludicrousness while secretly loving every minute of its madness. Pair it with "Eight-Legged Freaks" for a double feature and you’ve got yourself a perfect popcorn night. Just maybe... check under your seat first.
Argylle
A Spy Story That Spins Reality and Fiction
In the cinematic shuffleboard, where genre lines often blur, "Argylle" stands out, twirling its narrative cue with a wink and a nod. This week, if you’re sniffing around for what to watch, look no further than Matthew Vaughn's latest caper—a frothy mix of sharp wit and sharper action that hooks you faster than a spy can say "cover blown."
"Argylle," helmed by the visionary behind the adrenaline-pumping "Kingsman" series, plunges into the thrilling yet perilous world of a reclusive author, played by Bryce Dallas Howard. Her latest spy thriller, not content to stay bound within the pages, starts mirroring real-world events with eerie precision. The plot thickens, much like the coffee in her cluttered writer's nook, as reality and fiction become indistinguishable.
From the get-go, "Argylle" toys with the mechanics of storytelling. Vaughn masterfully portrays the creative process of Howard’s character, whose every literary twist materializes visually. Words falter on the page, characters argue back, and plots twist before our eyes, making "Argylle" a meta-narrative marvel. It's a celluloid celebration of the chaotic, often frustrating, beauty of writing.
Enter Henry Cavill, channeling his inner John Travolta with a hairdo that screams action hero from a mile away. Cavill's presence brings a robust charm to the film, meshing seamlessly with the mysterious overtones. However, the true scene-stealer is Sam Rockwell, playing a super-spy aiding our bewildered author. Rockwell's charisma is magnetic, ensuring that even the most expositional scenes are glazed with a coat of entertainment.
The action sequences? They're the kind you'd rewind to catch every meticulously choreographed move—a testament to Vaughn's expertise. However, amid the high-octane chases and stunts, the film employs CGI with a heavy hand, occasionally overshadowing the raw, bone-breaking stunts that give action its edge.
Yet, it's not all smooth sailing. The film's ambitious blend of high-stakes espionage and personal drama sometimes clashes more than it coalesces. The poignant family dynamics, meant to add depth, occasionally drift into melodramatic waters, diluting the otherwise crisp narrative.
But here’s why "Argylle" should be your pick for what to watch this week: it's an audacious blend of fantasy and thriller, wrapped in a glossy spy package. Whether it's the stunning visuals, the sly narrative undertones, or the simple joy of watching top-tier actors at play, "Argylle" offers a slick escape into a world where the pen is not only mightier than the sword but also more explosive.
Might this be what to watch this week?
As the credits roll (and do stay for them—there’s a teaser that promises even more intrigue), "Argylle" assures you that the spy game, much like the craft of writing, is about the journey, not just the destination. Ready for a stylish ride through a spiraling narrative that’s as much about the creation as it is about the creator? Then "Argylle" is your ticket this week. Catch it, analyze it, but most importantly, enjoy the hell out of it.
La Chimera
A Dive into the Underworld of Art and Mystery
Ever wondered what it's like to chase shadows in the dark, or in this case, beneath the earth? Well, strap in for a cinematic excavation with "La Chimera," a film that transports you to the gritty underbelly of Italy's archaeological black market. Directed by the enigmatic Alice Ro Walker, known for her film "Happy as Lazzaro," this isn't your typical treasure hunt—it's a stylish delve into the blurred lines between legality and lore.
Set in the vibrant chaos of the 1980s, "La Chimera" follows a band of grave robbers, or should we say, history enthusiasts with a questionable moral compass. Led by Arthur, played by the ever-charming Josh O'Connor (think "God's Own Country" with a dash of debonair despair), this gang of cultural pirates navigates the ancient landscapes searching for Etruscan tombs ripe for the picking. But here’s the twist—Arthur, our British protagonist with an Italian flair, possesses an almost mystical ability to locate these forgotten relics, drawing us into a narrative as rich as the tombs they're plundering.
What to watch this week? If you're looking for a film that combines the thrill of adventure with the solemnity of a period piece, "La Chimera" is it. The film, crafted with a cinematographer’s eye by Helen Louvar (who also shot "Never Rarely Sometimes Always"), casts a haunting spell of magical realism over the narrative. The vistas are not only breathtaking but serve as a poignant reminder of the impermanence of glory and the eternal chase for beauty.
Isabella Rossellini, playing a matriarch with secrets as deep as the tombs, delivers a performance that oscillates beautifully between warmth and mystery. The dialogues, often overlapping like the chaotic lives of the characters, add a layer of authenticity and dynamic energy to the scenes, making each moment feel lived-in and real.
"La Chimera" is more than a film; it's an experience that builds up like a well-tuned symphony. It starts slow, meandering through seemingly disconnected scenes, but by the climax, you realize that every note was necessary. In an era where cinematic narratives are often spoon-fed, Walker challenges the viewer to engage actively, piece together the narrative fragments, and ultimately, question the morality of our fascination with the past.
Might this be what to watch this week?
So, if you’re pondering what to watch this week, let "La Chimera" be your guide to a world where the past isn't just history, it’s a puzzle waiting to be solved. With its blend of mystery, art, and philosophy, set against the lush backdrop of Italian heritage, it’s a film that promises to leave you contemplating long after the credits roll.
In an age where films often mimic one another, "La Chimera" stands out—a true gem dug out from the depths of cinematic creativity. Don’t miss out on this masterpiece that not only entertains but enlightens, proving once again why we should cherish and support visionary filmmaking.
Mia Copa
A Quirky Tyler Perry Misfire Worth a Watch?
"Mia Copa" isn't just a film; it's a cultural critique wrapped in a Tyler Perry special—a mix that's bound to trigger some, humor others, and leave many just plain baffled. If you’re wondering what to watch this week and are up for a jaunt through the convoluted alleys of Perry's cinematic psyche, here's your sign to dive in.
First things first, "Mia Copa" stars Kelly Rowland and Trevante Rhodes, two powerhouses who deserve their flowers for attempting to navigate through the swampy plotlines Perry throws their way. The film, dressed up as a psychological thriller, tips its hat to eroticism but with the subtlety of a bull in a china shop.
Rowland plays Mia, a defense attorney who somehow ends up representing a murder-accused artist played by Rhodes. The legal thriller takes a nosedive into romance, or whatever Perry passes off as romance these days, spiraling into an erotic thriller that feels more like a parody than pulse-pounding cinema. If the setup sounds intriguing, that's because the first 20 minutes are—baiting viewers with a semblance of structure before unloading Perry’s typical narrative chaos.
Now, why should this film be on your "what to watch this week" radar? Well, it shouldn’t, if you’re seeking high art. But if you're in the mood for a film that turns unintentional comedy into an art form, then buckle up! "Mia Copa" turns from potential courtroom drama to a bizarre love triangle with detours through plot holes so large they could be mistaken for art installations.
As usual, Perry’s writing is an adventure in how not to portray women—or men, for that matter. His characters are as thin as the paper they’re scripted on, fluttering wildly in the winds of implausible scenarios and dialogue so wooden it’s basically petrified. Yet, there's something undeniably compelling about watching top-tier actors navigate this hot mess. It’s like reality TV—you know it’s bad, but can you look away?
Might this be what to watch this week?
In conclusion, "Mia Copa" is a spectacle of what happens when Perry is left unchecked. It’s a testament to his unique ability to both entertain and exasperate, often in the same scene. If you’re curious about how low the bar can go while still providing some level of entertainment, add this to your "what to watch this week" list. At the very least, it will make you appreciate the finer films in life—or just provide a good laugh.
Code 8
Part II
Not Quite X-Men, But Who's Complaining?
If you're scrounging around Netflix this week looking for something new to sink your teeth into, and you have a thing for under-the-radar superhero flicks that don't quite scream "blockbuster" but have a charm all their own, "Code 8: Part II" might just be what you need to watch this week.
Returning with the Amell cousins (not brothers, though you'd be forgiven for the mix-up), "Code 8: Part II" takes us back to its gritty, superpowered universe, where being special might just make you a target. It picks up right where the first film left off, so new viewers, be warned: do your homework and watch "Code 8" first, or risk being as lost as a tourist without Google Maps.
The sequel continues the story of power-imbued individuals navigating a society that fears and controls them—a familiar premise for anyone who's seen their fair share of "X-Men." However, where "Code 8: Part II" shines is in its world-building, detailed in a way that feels more organic and less "we’re doing this because superheroes are hot right now."
For those who spent the first movie feeling like they were watching someone mash together superpowers with a crime thriller, the sequel smooths out these edges. The integration feels more natural this time around, like a well-aged wine compared to a new blend. The plot still revolves around underground crime and moral complexities, which might sound run-of-the-mill, but thanks to some heartfelt performances and better integration of elements, it manages to hold your interest.
The real appeal, especially if you're a fan of the Amell family tree, is watching the chemistry between the leads, who manage to elevate the script above its station. "Code 8: Part II" won't revolutionize cinema as we know it, but it’s a solid choice for what to watch this week if you’re in the mood for something that’s part superhero saga, part heist drama, with a sprinkle of family dynamics.
Might this be what to watch this week?
In conclusion, if your Netflix scroll has landed you on "Code 8: Part II" and you're wondering if it's worth the watch—yes, it is. Especially if you’re the kind who likes a little superpowered escapism without the Marvel or DC logo. It’s not going to make any top ten lists, but as far as entertainment goes, it's a strong contender for your next movie night pick. Happy viewing!
The Beekeeper
Un-BEE-lievable Action, Un-BEE-table Plot
What happens when you mix Jason Statham, a beekeeper, and a nefarious plot involving identity theft? You get "The Beekeeper," a film that buzzes with high-octane action yet might leave you scratching your head, wondering if you missed a turn somewhere. Directed by David Ayer, a filmmaker known for gritty narratives but not quite for coherence, "The Beekeeper" promises thrills with a dash of absurdity.
Honey, I Shrunk the Logic
Right off the comb, Jason Statham delivers what he does best—meticulous ass-kicking that’s as precise as a bee’s dance. The plot, a simplistic yet bizarre tale of a beekeeper turned vigilante, buzzes from one action sequence to another without much care for narrative logic. The violence is dialed up, sprinkled with enough B-puns to make it groan-worthy yet smirk-inducing, suggesting that "The Beekeeper" doesn’t take itself too seriously—a saving grace or its biggest flaw, depending on your taste.
For Whom the Bell Tolls: B-Movie or Bee Movie?
In the world of "The Beekeeper," every punch and every knife thrust is choreographed with a gritty flair that almost makes you forget the plot holes large enough to drive a truck through. Ayer's direction ensures the action scenes are visible amidst quick cuts, giving the film a visceral feel that action aficionados might appreciate. Yet, despite Statham's charisma, the movie often feels like it's meandering through its paces without much sting.
What to Watch This Week: "The Beekeeper"?
If you’re itching for action and can leave your brain at the door, "The Beekeeper" might just be what to watch this week. It’s a cinematic fast food: it's not good for you, but it's deliciously bad. Statham's fans will find plenty to love, and Ayer's followers might appreciate his unapologetic return to form. However, for those seeking a movie with a plot that makes sense, this may not be your hive.
Final Buzz: B-Movie Bliss or Miss?
"The Beekeeper" is an action-packed romp that knows its audience. If you crave a film where Jason Statham protects his hive with the ferocity of a queen bee, look no further. It's an absurd, violent, and wildly entertaining film that fits the bill for a mindless evening out. As for what to watch this week, why not choose something that doesn’t sting the intellect but tickles the funny bone?
In a nutshell, "The Beekeeper" is a reminder that not all movies need to make sense to be enjoyable, especially if they feature Statham doing what he does best—delivering high-octane, bee-autiful action.
You'll Never
Find Me
A Slow Burn in the Outback
Slow and Steady Wins the Race? Not Always, Mate.
"You'll Never Find Me" plunges into the depths of Australian horror, a genre as wild and unpredictable as the Outback itself. The film, directed by Indiana Bell and Josiah Allen, nestles into a chilling stormy night narrative with an intimacy that could make claustrophobics squirm. Set in a dingy trailer park and centered around two strangers, this psychological thriller digs into paranoia and gender power dynamics, or so it promises.
Atmospheric or Just Plain Catatonic?
The true star of this film is the atmosphere. The directors manipulate space and silence with the finesse of a seasoned con artist, setting a trap of tension that, unfortunately, often snaps shut too late. This slow burn could be an Olympic sport in patience-testing—prepare to watch the paint dry, but at least it’s creepy paint.
What to Watch This Week? Perhaps, But With Reservations.
This film's pacing mimics a koala's sprint; it’s not getting anywhere fast, but it’s cute enough to keep you watching. The performances are raw and stripped down, showcasing a formidable display of acting chops in close quarters. For those who enjoy a film that feels like a theatrical play, "You'll Never Find Me" might just tickle your fancy.
The Cinematic Equivalent of a Gourmet Meal... That Takes Too Long to Serve.
While the ending delivers a visual and thematic feast that may justify the wait, the journey there is laden with long, drawn-out scenes that might test the resolve of even the most ardent horror aficionados. The film shines in its final act, transforming into a visually arresting tableau that finally aligns with the eerie promises of its premise.
So, What to Watch This Week?
If you're in the mood for a horror that's more of a slow waltz than a tango, "You'll Never Find Me" offers a uniquely atmospheric experience that’s worth watching—at least once. Available for streaming as of March 22nd, it’s perfect for a stormy night in, especially if you're not in a hurry. But if your horror tastes demand constant thrills and chills, you might find this film's sedate pace more frustrating than frightening.
Final Verdict: A scenic route through terror that might just be a detour worth taking... if you have the time to spare.
Damsel
Is This the Knight in Shining Armor for Your Watchlist?
"Damsel," the latest Netflix spectacle, starring Millie Bobby Brown, offers up a medieval cocktail of dragons, damsels, and not-so-charming princes. It's a fantastical roller coaster that pushes the PG-13 envelope with fiery breaths that might just singe the faint-hearted. But is this merely a tale of sound and fury, or is there something worth watching beneath the surface?
Medieval Mishaps and Missed Opportunities
Millie Bobby Brown shines as a damsel less in distress and more in control, delivering smirks and smacks with equal aplomb. As we've come to expect from her, Millie's charm and charisma are the pillars holding up the somewhat crumbling edifice of "Damsel." The supporting cast, including the likes of Ray Winstone and Angela Bassett, show up, but don’t expect any performance Oscars here—the script doesn’t quite know what precious gems it has in these seasoned actors.
What to Watch This Week? Maybe Keep Scrolling...
"Damsel" promises much, with hints of being the next "must-watch" on your medieval menu. However, the film stumbles with a script that feels like it was penned by a court jester who took his role a tad too seriously. Clunky dialogues, a predictable plot, and a setup longer than a dragon's tail make for a tedious watch. Yet, when the action peaks, it does capture the eye—thank the heavens for that dragon, whose CGI flames are a rare treat in the often murky visuals of streaming cinema.
A Dragon's Breath Away From Being Forgettable
Despite its failings, "Damsel" has moments that sparkle—intense creature combat and a strong lead in Brown help keep the magic alive. For those looking for a casual weekend flick with impressive fantasy elements and a solid lead, "Damsel" might just scrape through as what to watch this week. But beware, it’s a bumpy ride through the medieval mire, and you might find yourself checking the time, wondering when the real action will begin.
Final Verdict: Only If You're Out of Options
In summary, "Damsel" is a mix of fierce and feeble, with enough spectacle to be a potential candidate for your "what to watch this week" list, especially if you enjoy a bit of sword with your sorcery. Just temper your expectations—this is no "Game of Thrones." It's more like a game of thrones, with emphasis on the lower-case, offering a lukewarm adventure that might just be enough if you’re not too picky. And really, who can resist a good-looking dragon?
Lift
Can This Heist Movie Steal Your Attention?
When Netflix announces a new heist movie, you can almost hear the collective groan of film aficionados. "Lift," not to be confused with a transportation app, delivers yet another ensemble caper that tries to soar high but barely gets off the ground. Starring Kevin Hart in a role that surprisingly benches his comedic chops for a more subdued heist honcho, "Lift" promises high-flying action that sadly never takes off.
Is It "What to Watch This Week"? Or a Descent into Forgettable Territory?
Directed by F. Gary Gray, a filmmaker known for both hits and misses, "Lift" assembles a cast that reads like a who's who of could-have-beens. From Vincent D'Onofrio to Sam Worthington, the talent is there but the spark isn't. The film plods along with a plot as predictable as a delayed flight, filled with the kind of dialogue that makes you wish you'd brought noise-canceling headphones.
The Camaraderie: A Band of Thieves with Nothing to Steal
Kevin Hart's attempt to play it straight as the mastermind behind an aerial art heist is as convincing as a wolf in sheep's clothing. The camaraderie among the cast is palpable, but it’s like watching a group of friends trying to make the best of a bad vacation. There are moments of potential brilliance, such as a mid-air heist sequence that almost pumps the adrenaline, but these are fleeting.
So, What to Watch This Week?
If you're in desperate need of background noise while folding laundry, then perhaps "Lift" can serve a purpose. It's not the worst movie on Netflix—that's a bar hard to limbo under—but it's far from the best. The film drifts into the realm of forgettable Netflix fare, where it will likely reside until the next big heist film steals its place.
In the pantheon of heist movies, "Lift" is unlikely to be remembered as anything other than a footnote. It's a flight of fancy that never truly leaves the runway, proving that even a stacked cast can't lift a lackluster script. For those pondering "what to watch this week," maybe keep scrolling—unless you're really into mildly entertaining heist antics that won't raise your pulse.
Land of Bad
A Title So Bad, The Movie Had To Be Better
"Land of Bad" storms into cinemas with a title so uninspiring it sets the bar low enough for an ant to limbo. Despite its uninviting moniker, the film tries to muscle through with a hefty dose of action and a sprinkle of Russell Crowe, because, let's face it, who doesn't get a little better with a bit of Crowe?
Crowe's Nest: Where the Action Isn't
In the sea of war films, "Land of Bad" emerges as a peculiar creature. It's not your garden-variety shoot-em-up; this one's got a bit of philosophy in its magazine, even if it doesn't quite know how to fire it. Russell Crowe, the man who can command a screen by reading a phone book, sits in a chair for most of the movie, proving that charisma can indeed come without movement. He's the voice in Liam Hemsworth's ear, guiding the pretty face through a war zone that's as generic as they come.
Is This "What to Watch This Week"? Unlikely, Unless You're a Crowe or Explosions Enthusiast
While the action may pop and fizzle like a well-made soda, the script is where "Land of Bad" fizzles out. Liam Hemsworth plays a character so lacking in depth he might as well be a shadow. Supposedly, he's the underdog, but let's face it—the only underdog vibe you get is from wondering if he'll ever get a personality.
The real meat of the movie tries to chew on the bone of modern warfare's impersonality. It's a theme ripe for exploration, yet it gets about as much development as Hemsworth's character arc, which is to say, not much. The discussions around how warfare has evolved into a button-pressing game are intriguing but ultimately lost in the shuffle of trying to keep the action rolling.
So, What To Watch This Week?
If you're in for a Sunday where the stakes are low and your need for intellectual stimulation is lower, "Land of Bad" might just fit the bill. It's a movie that promises some Russell Crowe and delivers exactly that, albeit him mostly sitting down. But if you're looking for something that'll stick with you longer than the popcorn at the bottom of your bucket, maybe keep looking.
"Land of Bad" is not the worst way to spend your time, but it's also not the best. It's like that middle of the road song on a mediocre album—it's fine, but you probably won't remember it by the end of the week. In a world of cinematic gold, this one is fool's gold: shiny from a distance but lacking real value upon closer inspection. If you're desperate for a dose of action, it might scratch the itch, but don't expect this land to be anything other than just, well, bad.
Night Swim
A Dive Into The Shallow End
"Night Swim" attempts to chill the spine with its haunted pool premise, but ends up more of a puddle than a deep dive. Produced by horror powerhouse Blumhouse and supposedly overseen by genre maestro James Wan, this film should have made waves; instead, it barely manages a ripple.
January Releases: Where Good Movies Go to Die
Held for a January release—a month notorious for cinematic flops—"Night Swim" sets expectations low and still struggles to meet them. If the endless trailer loop hadn't already dulled your senses, the film's actual content certainly will. It's what to watch this week if every other server on every streaming platform is down.
Haunted Pool or Just Waterlogged Script?
The premise, a haunting centralized around a suburban swimming pool, might have offered fresh takes in the haunted house genre. Instead, the film drifts listlessly into the territory of "been there, drowned that." It borrows heavily from superior films, swiping the eerie aesthetics of "Get Out's" sunken place and mimicking scenes straight out of "The Ring Two."
Carrie Conan tries her best as the matriarch unraveling the spooky secrets of her new home, but the script gives her as much depth as a kiddie pool. The rest of the cast, including Wyatt Russell, flounders without material to bring any real terror or tension to the surface.
Should You Watch It?
"Night Swim" might provide a few shivers if you're new to the horror genre or if your greatest fear involves pool maintenance. For anyone else, this film is a clear case of what to avoid this week unless you're in desperate need of background noise while you fold laundry. It's a perfect storm of clichés and missed opportunities, proving that not every film that makes it to production deserves a lifeguard on duty.
Might this be what to watch this week?
In a sea of horror mediocrity, "Night Swim" is particularly lifeless. With a plot that's leaking originality and performances that can barely stay afloat, this film is best left to the deep end—preferably with no lifeline. If you're looking for something haunting, you might find the lack of creativity here truly terrifying. For a chilling evening that actually delivers, you'll have to dive into deeper waters.
Madame Web
Struggling to Spin a Winning Web
"Madame Web", heralded as the most anticipated film of the year, crawls more than it swings. Starring Dakota Johnson, who delivers an earnest attempt amidst a muddled script, this Sony spin-off tries to exploit the Spider-Man universe without its titular hero. Unfortunately, it ensnares itself in its own convoluted plot faster than a fly in sticky silk.
A Web of Missed Opportunities
Set in a Spider-less Spider-Verse, "Madame Web" introduces Johnson as Cassandra Webb, a psychic tasked with protecting three girls from a villainous "Spider Guy" with powers eerily similar to our missing hero. The film spins from potentially engaging to a predictable snooze-fest, leaving viewers wondering, "What could have been?" if only it wielded its narrative with the finesse of Peter Parker's webs.
Dakota Johnson: The Silver Lining in a Stormy Script
Johnson, despite the script's shortcomings, shines occasionally, bringing charm to her character with glimpses of improvised brilliance that hint at what her portrayal could have offered under better circumstances. These fleeting moments, sadly, are swamped by dialogue so stiff it could be mistaken for early 2000s superhero fodder. "Madame Web" could have been a contender for what to watch this week, yet it falls dramatically short.
Should You Watch 'Madame Web'?
If the prospect of another superhero flick excites you, even when it's mired by mediocre execution and a forgettable antagonist, then perhaps a lazy Sunday might excuse a viewing. For anyone else, this web is too frayed to climb. "Madame Web" is a classic case of a promising idea that's lost in translation, tangled in poor writing and worse delivery.
Might this be what to watch this week?
For those seeking what to watch this week, look further—far beyond the reaches of this tangled web. "Madame Web" serves as a stark reminder that not all comic adaptations are created equal, and sometimes, even the most promising universes fail to deliver. In a world rich with cinematic treasures, this film barely makes a blip on the radar of must-sees.
In short, "Madame Web" is not the film to catch in your web this week—or any week, for that matter. It's a forgettable jaunt into a universe that deserves much better. Stick to the comics, or perhaps any other movie.
The American Society of Magical Negroes
Subverting Stereotypes or Just Another Gimmick?
When Satire Meets Sorcery: More than Just a Magical Misstep
Ever stumbled upon a trailer so peculiar it compels you to rethink the fabric of movie magic? "The American Society of Magical Negroes" does exactly that. This satirical spin takes a long, hard look at the trope of the 'magical negro'—the ever-sacrificial black character whose sole purpose seems to be rescuing floundering white protagonists. But what happens when they take center stage, armed with real magic? Chaos, comedy, and a considerable dose of controversy, that’s what.
Is It Worth Your Screen Time?
From the first glimpse, the trailer juggles a heavy-handed mix of humor and societal commentary, leaving you unsure whether to laugh or wince. The film dives headfirst into uncomfortable truths about race and representation, wrapped up in a whimsically subversive plot that could either be a clever masterpiece or a cringe-worthy mess. The true magic of this film lies not just in its on-screen spells but in its daring attempt to poke the bear of racial discomfort. If for nothing else, it’s what to watch this week for its boldness alone.
Uncomfortable Laughs and Unanswered Questions
As a witty, sharp-mouthed critic, one must appreciate the film's audacity. The audacious plot promises a blend of "Harry Potter" with a critical race theory class—unusual, unexpected, and unapologetic. The film's humor aims to unsettle, presenting white discomfort as the "most dangerous animal," a line that's bound to tickle some and tick off others.
Magical or Muddled?
Yet, beneath the spells and spectacle, the trailer hints at potential pitfalls. Can the film deliver its potent messages without becoming preachy? Will it transform its characters from stereotypes to fully fleshed out heroes? These are the spells it needs to cast correctly to avoid being relegated to the bargain bin of failed fantasy films.
Might this be what to watch this week?
"The American Society of Magical Negroes" could be what to watch this week if you’re craving something radically different. It’s a film that doesn’t just aim to entertain but also enlightens, for better or worse. Whether it succeeds or fails spectacularly, it promises to be a conversation starter. So, grab your popcorn (or your wands) and prepare for a film that’s as provocative as its title. Is it perfect? Doubtful. But it’s daring enough to demand your attention—and perhaps, that’s a kind of magic in itself.
